40 caused me, like many I’m sure, to pause and take stock of life. Hitting 40 has become this odd time of reflection for me. It’s also become an unfortunate time of loss and an acknowledgement of my own mortality.

The Weight of Mortality

With age comes a notion of how quickly time flows. Reaching 40 brought with it a sense of my own aging. It’s not that I suddenly felt ancient, but there was a shift in my perception of time and my place within it. For the first time at 40, I felt old. This was sobering and enlightening. It’s made me more conscious of how I spend my time, the importance of health, and the fleeting nature of life itself.

Reflecting on the Past

In the past year, I have lost friends. They were not my closest friends, but I made great memories with each during my 20s and early 30s. We shared good times and conversations that I still cherish. Their passing was upsetting, not only because of the loss itself but because it brought back a flood of memories and a stark reminder of how precious life is. So what’s been important:

Being open. Talking to close friends and family is healing. It is reassuring to feel that others can empathize.

Live in the hear and now. make the most of the time we have with the people, in terms of appreciating the now and not taking a moment for granted.

Professional Help. Working through those feelings with a counselor or therapist can be helpful. That means if you can’t make it through a loss and are so overwhelmed, it is okay to get help. Normalizing getting this type of support is so important.

Life after 40 seems different, but it provides an opportunity to grow and reflect, savoring every moment. Losses hurt deep; they serve as an example to further the value of the friendships and connections that I still have in place. For that, I am grateful.